Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger plays his heart out.
Nickelback, one Finnish researcher has figured you out.
Most simply accept the universal truth that people hate the purveyors of “How You Remind Me” and other elevator rock hits, but Salli Anttonen, a doctoral student at the University of Eastern Finland, proved it scientifically.
She recently scoured 14 years’ worth of reviews of the Canadian rock pariahs to pinpoint the true explanation of the widespread ire: the band lacks “a sincere identity.”
“Nickelback is too much of everything to be enough of something,” Anttonen wrote, according to the BBC. “They follow genre expectations too well which is seen as empty imitation.”
“Nickelback is too much of everything to be enough of something,” wrote a Finnish doctoral student.
She also discovered that early reviews didn’t skew so negative — but as the eardrum-grating rockers exploded, so did their volume of vocal critics.
Anttonen’s paper, appropriately enough, is titled, “‘Hypocritical Bulls–t Performed Through Gritted Teeth’: Authenticity Discourses in Nickelback’s Album Reviews in Finnish Media.”
There are other observable data.
Australia’s Queensland Police Service last year tweeted a “Wanted” poster accusing the group of “crimes against music.”
“Urgent police warning: Men matching this description expected to be committing musical crimes in Boondall tonight,” the police agency wrote.
Another hater in 2014 launched an online fundraiser to bar the band from performing in London.
“Just imagine, thousands — perhaps tens of thousands of music lovers — all not witnessing an exclusive concert by Nickelback in London,” wrote Craig Mandell. “It will be glorious. Legendary. Dare we say, game changing?”
The Canadian rockers will inflict themselves on Europe later this year.
Critics be damned, the band announced last week that it would embark on a 2016 European tour beginning Sept. 2 in Finland and ending Oct. 25 in England.
“To put it in the words of Chad Kroeger: ‘Get ready Europe, we are bringing one hell of a loud party to our fans over there!’” reads a warning issued on Nickelback’s website.